Misunderstood+Not Caring


nirvanasmile9
Photo by CJ

 

In the above photo I was 21. I actually had just turned 21, and I remember feeling empowered. This was one of the last fashion shoots I did for my blog because I was becoming sick of the fashion industry and dealing with catty fashion bloggers. But most of all I stopped having fun with what I was doing. I wish that burst of confidence lasted longer for me than it did. But I’m a lot more confident now.

Some days I’m not my most confident and I  still have bad days. But I know now that I’m a lot stronger than before. When things come up I’m less likely to cry or panic. I think that I’m controlling my anxiety the best that I can. Everyday in every way I’m becoming better and better. Sometimes I question if I’ll ever find what I’m looking for. Good people, a great guy, and good memories. Those things will eventually come. I’m not that girl in the photo anymore. My confidence isn’t fake. It’s real now. I’m happy. Not everyday or all day, but I’m happy.

There’s nothing wrong with me. I don’t have issues, I have stories. I have tools to make me a better person. I’m not perfect, and I don’t want to be. Maybe I’m misunderstood, but sometimes you have to stop caring about the opinions of others.

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